Bedtime thoughts

Her teeth are brushed.  She's in her pull-up and P.J.s for the night.  She kisses her brother good night and plays quietly in her room while I put Ti down for the night in our room.

I nurse Ti in peace and quiet and lay him down awake.  Thankfully he usually does not protest.  I kiss him good night and go back to Ari's room.

We lay down in the twin mattress on the floor and she wants to read ALL the Barenstain Bear books, of course.  I tell her we only have time for one tonight because it's very late...   She hands me a book and wants me to read it while she reads another one on her own... She does this often--wanting to read side by side.  But I tell her I want to read to her and she gives in after a bit of persuasion.  (I'm just too tired and hungry tonight and would like her to fall asleep soon... this time feels like just another chore...I just want it to be over...)   She has a question on every page as I read.  (I wonder if she's trying to prolong staying awake...and it irritates me.)

Some random nights she tells me to go away and she falls asleep by herself but lately she's wanting me to stay with her.
I try and help her process the day...by asking questions and help her answer about things we saw,did and felt throughout the day.  Then we lay there together in the semi dark room and I keep reminding her that it's time to close her eyes and go to sleep.  After a few reminders, it is quiet.  I carefully look over at her face.  Two bright sparkles...she's staring at the ceiling... unaware that my eyes are on her.

I stare at her precious little face beside me in the dark... I wonder what her beautiful little sparkling eyes are seeing...what she's thinking about.

I pray for Joy in my heart... for eyes to see through daily routines and tasks to be accomplished...the ability to stop and recognize the treasure and wonder... to serve my children not only good and healthy food for the body but for their souls, as God offers mine through them.